Strike Three!

Well, three miscarriages. But I made it further this time. Six weeks exactly.

I called my OB/GYN (that I can't see because I have no insurance and can't get Medicaid until I get a doctor confirmed positive test) and the nurse "quietly" told me to take folic acid and pre-natal vitamins. Even if I don't take the pre-natal vitamin to, for sure, take the folic acid.

I have PCOS. The last time my hormone levels were taken my testosterone levels were normal, but on the high side of normal. My female hormones weren't checked. But she feels that because I'm loosing my babies in the 4-6 week mark and making it further each time, that my progesterone levels are low and slowly, because of the pregnancies, rising.

Long story short. Folic Acid should help. And if it doesn't, when we get Ava's green card and he starts working at the prison and we get on insurance, then I'll go back to the doctor and we'll dive right into when ever we need to dive into.

Mixed emotions.

The Power of Suggestion

Most of the time I feel like I have a pretty level head on my shoulders. Then there are those other times that I feel completely nuts! I've been having pregnancy symptoms for a solid three weeks now. The nausea was unbearable for the first ten days or so, then slowly got better. The spells didn't last most of the day, the smells were getting easier to tolerate (or avoid), and I seemed to have found several ways to deal with the nausea when it did come.

I have wicket heartburn, am rediculously sleepy, running to the bathroom every fifteen minutes (literally) to pee, my parts aren't snug at the waistline, but they are snug, my "other" bathroom habit has changed (for the better on my part since I have no gallbladder), along with many other symptoms. Plus, I've missed a period!

According to my calculations, I should be about 6 1/2 weeks. Mom, and everyone else, has been begging me to take a pregnancy test. I've fought them until last night. I've had two miscarriages - the first one I actually got a positive result and after bleeding for a few days, retested and got a negative. I do not want to see another negative test, even if it was/will be a false negative. I want to have two missed periods under my belt (or in my womb!) before I even think about taking one. And after I think about it for another missed period, then I'll take one!

Anyway, so I took one. Negative.

I still feel "full," the heartburn is bad, I'm still feel sleep deprived, and the nausea is still the same! What is going on? And, still no period.

What is going on?!

I want a baby so bad!

I'm trying to trust in the Lord's timing. I need a countdown clock or something!

Pretty Flower

As all know, our area received a huge amount of rain over a several day period. After the skies cleared and the waters have begun to recede, then the lights choose to go out. Ava, Megan, and I are in our living room waiting for them to come back on. Ava gets up and goes to the bathroom to prepare for bed. Then I smell it! I ask Megan, "Do you smell that?"

She calmly says, "Maybe it was Ava. He did go to the bathroom."

"No. It smells like a skunk."

Jarom's dog, Shorty, has a habit of getting sprayed quite often. He has already been sprayed this week. At first I thought it was him and he was maybe sleeping on our steps and the smell was wafting in. I get up to get a drink and pass by the front door. A lot worse there. Then I made a mistake. I opened the door! Great googaly moogaly! It was really fresh! And it was right in our front yard!

I have only experienced the new skunk smell once before and I knew I didn't want to again. Epic defensive tool! Like, the best! Ever!

Well played Flower. Well played, indeed!